Life Jokes

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Horses
Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip are entertaining the King and Queen of Tonga, during the visit they accept a customary ride in the horse drawn cart around the grounds of Sandringham Castle.
During the trip, one of the horses farts and the sound and smell carries all the way through the cart to the royals. Embarrassed by this, the Queen whispers in Phillip’s ear “do you think I should mention that to our guests?”. Phillip agrees to say “yes that would be a good idea”.
So the Queen leans over to the King of Tonga and says: “please do excuse me, I’m very embarrassed about that”, to which the King of Tonga replies, “That’s ok ma’am, I thought it was the horse”.

An Engineer
An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess.”
He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week.” The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.
The frog then cried out, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I’ll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want.” Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, “What is the matter? I’ve told you I’m a beautiful princess, that I’ll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won’t you kiss me?” The engineer said, “Look I’m an engineer. I don’t have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that’s cool.”

Ninth Grader
The topic for my ninth-grade class was palindromes, words or sentences that are the same read forward and backward. I asked the question “What is the first thing Adam said to Eve?”
I was expecting the answer “Madam, I’m Adam,” but one student had a better reply:
“Wow.”

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